Sunday, January 31, 2010

The Joys(?!) of Being Overweight

I have always been overweight. And it has kinda become my USP now. People actually walk up to me and say, “You shouldn’t lose weight. You look so cute this way!”

I love it when people say that. Never mind whether they really mean it or not.

But when your comrade-in-arms (read another overweight partner) loses weight and continues losing weight till you find it hard to believe this was the same crusader of overweight-is-cool, that’s when you lose all hope.

And then of course there’s the whole issue of presumptuous presumptions.

“You overeat. Therefore you are overweight.”

“You are not self disciplined. Therefore you are overweight.”

“You don’t drink enough water. Therefore you are overweight.”

Well, let me break the myth. I DO NOT overeat. I AM self disciplined. I drink EIGHT litres of water every day. And I am thirty kilos overweight.


And then of course the failed love stories.

I do not know why and I don’t think I ever will understand why men, when they discover that an overweight girl has a crush on them, either laugh, run away or just feel pity for them. I mean, hello! I am overweight, not retarded.

And the worst of the lot are the so called “friends”.

“You never told me! Why???”

Well, what would I have told you in the first place? I like that guy. Now please laugh.

“YOU like HIM?”

Oh! I didn’t know it was such a sacrilege. Please forgive me!

“But how can it be, sweetheart? You should choose someone more like you!”

Yeah. Right. Please find me a rhinoceros.

Just because a girl is overweight, does that strip her of her right to dream, and go after it?

Just because overweight girls don’t sulk when you crack weight jokes on them, they laugh merrily at their own expense, and totally understand when the guy they have been secretly in love with for the past forever falls for the new skinny girl in town, it doesn’t mean that they belong to another species.

I mean, come on people! Just like there are dark girls, dumb girls, skinny girls, there are overweight girls. And no, they don’t eat all the time. They think, they feel, they dream. And yes, they hurt too.

And thanks to the new size zero trend, overweight girls are feeling even smaller now. What an irony, eh?

But I think there are up sides to this situation as well. At least when a boy comes up to me and tells me that he likes me, I’ll know that it’s because of who I am and not because I look hot or anything.

But do such boys exist? As far as I know, they don’t. They always go for the skinny, over melodramatic ones.

But what the hell man? Let men who run after looks rot in hell, or wherever they are headed to.

But does that mean that I have lost all hope? (Yes I know that’s the fourth paragraph I have started with the word ‘but’ in it.) No I have not. It’s just that I think I’ll have to look a little more carefully to find that gem who’ll love me for who I am and not what I weigh.

And yeah, on a totally disconnected note, I hate females who aggressively pursue the man they have set their eyes on and try to conquer him like some battle. Have some self-respect girls. He’s just a man, not the best dress on sale!

Yeah. And overweight girls, watch Mahi Way on Sony TV. It’s nice, funny, and yeah, at some points, over the top, but nonetheless, worth a watch.